Illusion of Gaia Translation Commentary Part 11: Gold Ship
In which a friend is killed horribly yayyyyy
Disclaimers:
I’m an amateur. My advantage over the original translation is that I have no deadline pressure, and I have the modern internet to help me. I’m assuredly wrong about some of my translations.
Translation is hard. When I point out a mistranslation, it’s not a judgment of the original translator(s). They had a deadline and poor resources.
Please no jokes in the comments about Karen being a Karen. I really hate that trend.
Notation reminder:
JP: Original Japanese
T: My translation
OE: Original English
There are a bunch of people on the gold ship, which of course makes no sense. The only ones we’re required to talk to are the Queen and the lookout in the crow’s nest, but of course I’ll talk to them all:
JP: わーい わーい 王様が もどってきたあっ!
テム: (ボクが 王様だって???)
T: Hooray! Hooray! The king came back!
Tim: (I’m the king???)
OE: Look, look! The King has returned!
And he’s much shorter!
OE added a joke. It undermines the scenario a little bit, because it’s not clear whether Tim looks a lot like the king, or Tim appears to these people exactly as if he was the king. In JP these people never give a hint of noticing any physical difference between the two.
I still don’t mind the joke here. It’s funny.
JP: これは 王様! よく ご無事でっ!
テム: (ボクが 王様だって???)
T: The king is here! I’m so glad you’re safe.
Tim: (I’m the king???)
OE: It’s the King! You’re safe!
Will: (I’m the King???)
JP: 王様っ! よく ご無事でっ! これで やっと 大海原へ 出船できますよ。
T: King! You’re safe! Finally, we can take to the ocean.
OE: King! You’re safe! Now we can set sail.
JP: これが 喜ばずに いられますかっ! 長い間 王様を 待ったかいが ありましたよっ!
T: This is cause for celebration! We’ve waited for the king for so long.
OE: It’s a happy occasion! We have waited for you for such a long time!
JP: おきさき様は 船室でございます。 はやく その元気な お姿を 見せてあげて下さいまし。
T: Her majesty is in the cabin below. You should head down quickly so she can see that you’re well.
OE: The Queen is in her stateroom. Please show her that you’re OK.
Ooh, nice inclusion of state room.
Below, there’s a woman next to some beds:
JP: これは 王様。 船内を 見物なさっているのですね。
しかし 王様も おつかれのはず。 船をひととおり まわったら このベッドで 少しお休みください。
T: Hello, your majesty. So you’re taking a tour of the ship?
But your majesty must be tired. After you’ve explored the ship, please rest in this bed.
OE: Oh, King. Looking around the ship?
But I expect you’re tired. Look around, then rest in this bed.
You can’t actually rest until the ship has set sail. Further to the right is this person staring out the window:
JP: 暗ヤミにつつまれた どうくつの先に まばゆい光が 見える...
あの光にみちた 海原へ出船したとき 我々は 永遠の自由を 手に入れる のだ。
T: On the other side of the cave, hidden by darkness, I can see a dazzling light.
When we set sail into the ocean that’s filled with that light, we’ll obtain eternal freedom.
OE: Through the darkness, a bright light is visible in front of the cave…
As the ship set sail, that light represented the freedom we had just won.
In Japanese, sometimes when you want to say when or as something happens or happened, you use とき (toki - time). In this case, it’s preceded by 出船した (defuneshita - set sail (past tense)). You might think that, since set sail is in past tense, the とき clause would represent something in the past, in this case something like time when did set sail.
But they haven’t set sail yet, so that makes no sense. とき clauses like this change tense not based on the present moment necessarily, but based on what point in time the speaker is imagining speaking from.
Think of it this way: The modifier for とき in this JP sentence is past tense for the same reason that I might use after or once rather than when or as in English. Ex: We obtain eternal freedom, after we set sail… In that sentence I used obtain in the present tense even though it’s an event in the future, and used after to indicate something that will have happened in the past at that point in time. Japanese allows switching temporal perspective in the same way.
They didn’t actually bother to give this guy new dialogue after you set sail. He continues staring out the window and talking about the light on the other side of the cave.
Further to the right is the queen and an attendant. Here’s the attendant:
JP: おきさき様は 以前 王様が おくられたゆびわを 今でも 大切に 身につけて いらっしゃいます。
そうです。 しんりゃく者に追われ 王様とおきさき様が はなればなれに なるときに おくられたゆびわです。
T: Her majesty still takes great care to wear the ring that was given to her by your majesty.
That’s right. It’s the ring you gave her when the invaders were pursuing you and you were separated.
OE: The Queen is still wearing the ring she got from the King.
That’s right.
It’s the ring he gave her when they were separated by the invaders.
OE is accurate except for the 3rd person everywhere. All these people are supposed to think that Tim is the king. She speaks in 3rd person in Japanese, but that’s how most people speak when we’d normally use 2nd person in English.
JP: おきさき様は 王様のことを それだけ したっていらっしゃるので しょうね。
T: It shows just how much her majesty has been pining for your highness.
OE: Since then, she has thought of nothing but him.
Now we can talk to the queen:
JP: インカ女王: よくぞ ご無事で もどって くださいました。
あなたに 言われたとおり 風のミステリードールを 今日まで 守り続けてきましたわ。
T: Incan queen: I’m so thankful that you have returned safely.
I’ve been protecting the Mystery Doll of Wind to this day, just as you told me.
OE: Inca Queen: Good. You have returned safely.
As you were told, until now I’ve been guarding the Mystic Statue of the Wind.
OE makes a slight error, probably due to the many uses of the に (ni) particle. It’s not as you were told, it’s as (unspecified actor) was told by you. Amusingly, as you were told could have a secondary meaning of as you heard from other people on the ship. So the mistranslation is hardly even noticeable.
JP: あれは あなたが 神から さずかった石像ですものね。
下の倉庫の たからばこに しまってありますから ご自分の 目で たしかめてくださいな。
T: It’s the statue that the gods bestowed upon you.
You can see for yourself. It’s locked in a treasure chest in the storehouse below.
OE: That’s the statue you were awarded by the spirits.
It’s in the jewel box in the storehouse below, Look for yourself.
Thanks for the exposition, queenie! Nice of you to catch the king up on all this, just in case he’s forgotten or is actually a different person living centuries later.
She actually answers a question from the attract screen. Why do these strange statues look like gods? Because they were made by gods and bestowed upon humans, apparently!
There are more beds downstairs with someone in front.
JP: なんで ぼくたちは にげなくちゃ いけないの? インカは ぼくたちの お家なのに。
T: Why should we have had to run away? Even so, Inca is our home.
OE: Why must we flee? It is our home.
Also down below is a man guarding the chest.
JP: これは 王様。 ミステリードールは このハコの中で ございます。
それに そろそろ 出船の準備が ととのったようですよ。
T: Hello, your majesty. The Mystery Doll is inside of this box.
Moreover, our preparations to set sail seem to be almost complete.
OE: The Mystic Statue is in this box.
Preparations are being made to set sail.
JP: どうですか? 見張り台に のぼってみては? 出船の様子が 見られますよ。
T: Well? Will you climb the crow’s nest and take a look? You should be able to see us set sail.
OE: Well? Are you going to the crow’s nest? You can watch the ship set sail.
JP: ミステリードールを 見つけた!
T: Got the Mystery Doll!
OE: It’s a Mystic Statue!
Once we’ve taken the statue and talked to the queen, the person who was blocking the crow’s nest ladder will move. At the top:
JP: 見張り: 王様 外を ごらんください。 船が どうくつを ぬけます!
T: Lookout: Take a look, your majesty. The boat’s exiting the cave.
OE: Guard: Oh short King, look there. The ship is coming out of the cave!
Another joke about the king’s height inserted. The black background will fade way into the ocean, with this game’s excellent water effect that I’ve always found captivating. It’s more interesting in motion; screenshots won’t do it justice.
JP: 見張り: ずっと 暗ヤミで 生活をしてきた 我々にとって この海のかがやきは 神の光に 見えますよ。
世界は こんなにも 美しいのに なぜ しんりゃく者が 生まれ 自然を こわしてゆくのでしょうね。
T: Lookout: For us, who have lived in darkness for so long, the ocean’s shine looks like the light of god.
Though the world contains this beauty, I wonder how such invaders can be born who ruin and subjugate nature.
OE: Guard: After living in darkness for so long, the brightness is like a new beginning.
How can invaders come to destroy a world as beautiful as this?
(I hate my translation of the second sentence but I can’t be bothered to punch it up.)
You can jump all the way off the crow’s nest, which is one of this game’s many joys. The person by the beds will have new dialogue:
JP: こんな みすぼらしいベッドで 申しわけないんですが どうぞゆっくり 休んでください。
T: I’m very sorry this bed is so shabby, but please, take a rest whenever you’re ready.
OE: I’m sorry that it’s so shabby, but please try to get some rest.
JP: テム: ボクは もうれつな すいまに おそわれ 深い深い 夢の中へと いざなわれていった。
T: Tim: Overcome by intense fatigue, I was lured into a deep, deep dream.
OE: Will: I fell into a deep sleep, and was pulled inside a dream.
In Tim’s dream, he’s in a house and goes downstairs. His mother is there. When you speak to her in the US version, the scene blacks out except for a small circle around the two of them.
JP: テム: か かあさんっ!?
テムの母 シーラ: テム。 空を 見てごらん... ほら すい星が あんなにきれい。
T: Tim: M… Mom!?
Tim’s mom, Sheila: Tim, take a look at the sky. See? That comet is so pretty.
OE: Will: Mother?!
Will’s Mother, Shira: Look in the sky. The comet is so beautiful.
JP: すい星はね 長い長い 年月をかけて 地球に やってきて そして また 遠ざかっていくの。
T: That comet? Over the course of many, many years, it approaches the earth, eclipses it, and recedes.
OE: After years and years the comet approaches Earth, then recedes.
She doesn’t say eclipse necessarily. It covers the earth, or is spread over it, or something like that.
JP: あの星を 不幸を呼ぶ星っていう人も いれば しあわせの星と 呼ぶ人も いるわ...
テム。 あなたは どっちだと思う?
>ふこうの星
>しあわせの星
T: Some people think it invites disaster to our planet, but others say that it brings good fortune.
Tim, which do you think it is?
>It brings disaster.
>It brings good fortune.
ふこう (fukou): unhappiness, sorrow, misfortune, disaster. しあわせ (shiawase): happiness, good fortune, luck, blessing. I don’t like the choice of luck in OE but it’s not necessarily wrong.
The next dialogue box is different depending on your choice. If it brings disaster:
JP: そう... じゃあ ふこうが 訪れないように いのらなくちゃね...
T: So that’s what you think? Well, we’d better pray that’s not the case.
OE: All right… Then hope that the bad luck doesn’t come….
If it brings good fortune:
JP: そう... じゃあ しあわせが にげないように いのらなくちゃね...
T: So that’s what you think? Well, we’ll have to pray we get so lucky.
OE: All right… Then hope that happiness doesn’t slip away….
Literally: well, to be sure good fortune does not escape, [unspecified actor] must pray. OE is closer to literally correct but it sounds awkward to me.
Either way, she’ll wrap it up with:
JP: テムや。 私は いつでも あなたのことを 見守っていますよ。
T: Listen, Tim. I am always watching over you.
OE: Will. I am always watching over you.
When Tim wakes up, the ship looks… not as nice. Or as populated with living people.
JP: リリィ: テム!
テム! 起きて!
T: Lily: Tim!
Tim! Get up!
OE: Lilly: Will!
Will! Wake up!
Apparently Rob is here for some reason? But forget all that, before we do anything, I’m going to the bridge to get me a Red Jewel.
JP: モリス: さっき 船の中で きみょうな 宝石を 見つけたんです。 これ テムに あげますね。
T: Morris: I just found a strange jewel on the ship. Here, you can have it.
OE: Seth: I found a strange jewel on board the ship. I’ll give it to you.
You can talk to him again right after for more dialogue:
JP: そう言えば テムに 物をあげたのは 初めてかも 知れませんよね。 大事にしてくださいね。
T: Come to think of it, this might be the first time I’ve given you anything. Take care of it.
OE: It’s the first time I’ve ever given you anything. Take care of it.
Erik is up here too.
JP: エリック: わあっ! びっくりしたっ!!
なんだ テムかあ。 もう おどかさないでよっ!!
T: Erik: Aaahhh! Oh my god!!
Geez, Tim. Don’t scare me like that again!
OE: Erik: I was surprised!!
Oh, it’s you, Will. Don’t scare me!!
びっくりした (bikkurishita) literally means was startled. You could translate this as you startled me but it’s a common enough expression of surprise that it’s also translated as oh my god or you got me, etc. Lots of valid translations here. But in this context, I was surprised!! is not one of them.
Right, let’s talk to Lily and Rob now.
JP: リリィ: テムの帰りが あんまりおそいから 長老様に うらなってもらったの。
そしたら 海の上を 一人で さまよっているって言うんだもの。 びっくりしたわよ。
T: Lily: Since you were taking so long to return, we asked the Elder to divine where you were.
He said you were floating around on the sea, all by yourself. Imagine our shock!
OE: Lilly: You’re back so late, the Elder must have read your fortune.
He said that you were floating alone on the sea. I was so surprised.
Here, on the other hand, translating びっくりした as I was surprised or we were surprised is appropriate.
さまよっている (samayotteiru) means roaming about. I translated as floating around, since we don’t usually talk about ships roaming or loitering.
As for the OE… yeah. Unfortunate. I understand not using the exact right definition for うらなって (uranatte), which can be to tell one’s fortune, to divine, to predict, to forecast. But it seems like the translator missed もらった (moratta) entirely. Following a verb’s te form, this means to get someone to do something. They got the elder to divine/predict.
As for Rob…
JP: ロブ: お前の様子が 変だから 3人で こっそり 後をつけたんだ。
そしたら 変な村に たどりついてさ...
T: Rob: You were acting really fishy, so we 3 secretly tailed you.
That led us to a weird village.
OE: Lance: You were acting strange, so we followed you.
Then we reached a strange town…
JP: リリィ: ちょっとお。 あたしの 生まれた場所なんだから 変な村なんて 言わないでよっ。
ロブ: じゃうぶん 変な村じゃねえかっ。 目に見えない村なんてよっ。
T: Lily: Hey! That’s my birthplace you’re talking about. Don’t call it weird!
Rob: I’d say a village you can’t see is plenty weird enough.
OE: Lilly: Wait. Don’t call it strange. I was born there.
Lance: It’s invisible. I’d call that pretty strange.
JP: テム。 おれたちに かくれて 旅に出よう ったって そうは いかないぜ。
友達だったら 楽しみと 苦労は わかちあわなくっちゃな。
T: Tim. You think you can up and disappear on our friends, ditch us while you travel!? No way!
Friends share both good times AND bad.
OE: Will. You can’t go on a journey without telling us.
Since we’re friends, we have to share good times and bad.
He says this now, but I wonder if he changes his tune in 5 minutes when Morris friggin’ dies. (Uh… spoilers.)
And neither of you explained at all how the heck you made it onto this ship!
If you check any of the corpses lying around, they all say the same thing.
JP: テム: ここは さっき インカ人が 立っていた場所だ...
T: Tim: This is the spot the Incan was standing just a while ago.
OE: Will: This is where the Inca were standing.
Karen is staring at the queen’s body.
JP: カレン: もどるはずのない インカ王の帰りを まちつづけて 彼らは 死んでいったのよね...
平和にくらしてた人たちの 生活を こなごなにするなんて ゆるせないよ やっぱり...
T: Karen: They died waiting for the king, but he never returned.
I can’t bear it when peaceful people, minding their own business, have their lives so utterly destroyed.
OE: Kara: They perished waiting for the King’s return…
I can’t stand anything that disrupts people’s peaceful lives.
How does Karen know they were waiting for the king to return? Tim knows because some ghosts told him.
My translation of the second sentence is too wordy. The original’s good except for one thing: disrupts isn’t forceful enough. こなごなにする (konagonanisuru) means to pulverize or shatter.
JP: きさきの ミイラが 静かに ねむっている。
その 細くて 長い指には 黄金のゆびわが はめられている ようだ...
T: The queen’s mummy is quietly sleeping.
It looks like a gold ring is fitted on one of her long, thin fingers.
OE: The Queen’s mummy sleeps silently.
There’s a gold ring on her long, slender, bony finger…
JP: リリィ: この船に 積みこまれた 貴重な 黄金細工っていうのは きっと その ゆびわのことだよね。
他の どの黄金細工より かがやいていたんじゃ ないかなあ。
T: Lily: That ring must be one of the valuable gold treasures that are rumored to be on this ship.
I’m guessing it shone brighter than any of the other gold treasures.
OE: That ring must be one of the artifacts put on this ship.
This is the most valuable of all the artifacts.
JP: カレン: 黄金を 見つけて お金もちに なろうとした 人たちは こんな ゆびわのために 命を 落としたわけね。
あたし この ゆびわ もらっとこ。 かわいくて なんだか すっごく 気にいっちゃった。
T: Karen: I bet some gold hunters seeking fortune lost their lives in search of this ring.
I’m gonna take this ring. It’s kinda cute and I think it would really suit me.
OE: Kara: Many people have lost their lives trying to get rich by finding this ring.
I want the ring. It’s so pretty. I really must have it.
Ooooh, my girl Karen is grave robbing! Idunno about this. On the one hand: yeah, grave robbing, ugh. On the other hand: uh… Tim is a grave robber. This whole ship is a mass grave and I took the Mystic Statue. Not to mention all the herbs and jewels that I just got out of the Incan ruins, which an Itory villager said was a tomb of the ancients. Maybe it’s different if it’s something on a corpse, but let’s not forget all the times Tim just shoved aside corpses to look at people’s private letters. On one he even took an amulet out of its hand and read what was sealed inside. This dude loves taking things off corpses.
There’s really no fate for this ship other than to sink. Even if it weren’t going to be destroyed in a minute, which it is, it couldn’t last that much longer. All else equal I’d rather the historical artifact be saved. But this is something arguably crummy that Karen does. Karen haters score a point. Lily is predictably angered:
JP: リリィ: あなたには えんりょってものが ないの?! のろわれても 知らないからねっ!
T: Lily: Have you no restraint at all!? That thing could be cursed!
OE: Lilly: Have you no shame!?!? You could be cursed!!!
Literally It’s because don’t know, even if [unspecified thing or actor] is cursed. Not clear whether it’s Karen or the ring.
It’s also not clear whether Karen succeeds in taking the ring off the queen. In any case, the ship starts shaking violently.
JP: カレン: な なに?
T: Karen: W… what?
OE: Kara: What?
JP: リリィ: リバイヤサンかも しれないっ!
このあたりの海には 化け物みたいに おっきくて どうもうな魚がいるんだ よっ!!
T: Lily: It could be a leviathan!
It’s a huge, ferocious, monster-like fish that lives in these waters!
OE: Lilly: Maybe it belongs to Riverson!
In this part of the ocean, there are fish that are as dangerous as, well, sharks!!
OOF.
If you’re a fan of this game you might have already heard that Riverson is supposed to be leviathan. JP is リバイヤサン (ribaiyasan). If it were supposed to be Riverson, it would probably be リバーサン (ribaasan). Whether there’s one or many leviathans is unclear, but I think there’s more than one. So I translated as a leviathan.
But that’s not all that’s mangled here. Maybe it belongs to Riverson? Is she talking about the ring!? Uh, no, Lilly, it belongs to the queen. (Or maybe Karen.) Leviathan probably doesn’t wear rings.
The sentence is リバイヤサンかも しれない (ribaiyasan kamo shirenai). かもしれない means might/perhaps/etc. The sentence is literally Maybe leviathan. There’s nothing belonging to anyone here.
I know it’s only one sentence, not a big deal, but I can’t stop imagining leviathan attacking this ship because GRRR THEY’RE STEALING MY RING.
The second sentence could actually be a decent translation, if Lily were talking about the ocean or fish in general. But she’s talking about the specific one that is attacking the ship, so the OE is a bizarre non sequitur.
JP: ロブ: だいじょうぶかっ?
T + OE: Rob/Lance: Are you OK?
JP: うわあああああああああああああっ
ロブ: モリスの悲鳴だっ! かんぱんの方から 聞こえたぞっ!
T: Aaaaaaaahhhh!
Rob: That scream was from Morris! It came from the deck!
OE: Wa-a-a-a—a-ah!!!!
Lance: That’s Seth! It’s coming from the deck!
JP: ロブ: モリスは どうしたっ?! 何が あったんだっ!!
エリック: うえぇぇぇぇぇぇぇぇん モリスが モリスが...
T: Rob: Is Morris ok!? What happened!?
Erik: Wwwwwwwwwaaaaahhh! Morris… Morris…
OE: Lance: What happened to Seth? Something happened!
Erik: Eeeeeeeh!!! It’s Seth!!…
JP: でっかい魚が 船にぶつかってきて ヒック...
モリスが 海の中に おっこって ヒック...
T: A gargantuan fish crashed into the ship and… *sob*
Morris fell off the ship and… *sob*
OE: A huge, enormous, giant fish ran into the ship! Sob…
Seth fell in the water! Sob…
JP: うわあぁぁぁぁぁん モリスが 食べられちゃったよう ヒック ヒック...
ロブ: な 何だってっ?!
T: Wwwwwwwaaaaahhhhh! It looked like it ate Morris whole! *sob* *sob*
Rob: W… What did you say!?
OE: He was swallowed! Gulp… Sob…
Lance: What was that?
Oh. Well. I guess Morris is dead.
Alas, Morris, we hardly knew ye. Seriously, you had like 15 lines, they wouldn’t give you new dialogue in the cave at all. You just kept saying that you were sure to win again, over and over.
Well Morris, in your honor, I offer this delightful illustration I found from user Alandar on deviantart:
It took me a moment, but I totally see it. Zoom in on the image to see the sprite better. Wonderful.
JP: エリック: うわああああああん また あの魚だぁっ! ボクら 食べられちゃっうんだぁっ!
ロブ: 泣いてる ヒマがあったら 何かに つかまれっ! ふりおとされるなよっ!
T: Erik: Waaaaah! It’s the fish again! We’re gonna get eaten!
Rob: If you’ve got time to cry, grab onto something! don’t get thrown off!
OE: Erik: Aaaggh! It’s that fish again! We’ll all be dessert!!
Lance: Stop crying, and grab this, or you’ll fall overboard!!
I think we’ll all be dessert is a fantastic punch up to the original line. At this point, everyone gets thrown off the ship. Tim and Karen are going to spend a few days stranded on a raft, which is where we’ll pick up next time.
I expect these blog entries to come a bit slower from here out. I made most of these translations years ago, and we’ve caught up to the point where I lost steam—midway through the drifting sequence. Hopefully I can keep it up this time and see it through. See you next time, and pour one out for Morris. Then pour another one out for Seth.